u t h p s t r

i’m at a huge crossroads right now and it’s setting me on edge.

i’m wondering if i should i continue with my dmin or just call it quits.  let me preface this by saying i have a 50+ paper due in 33 days.

• i could quit now and not to the paper.
• i could finish the paper, submit it and call it quits.
• i could finish and submit the paper and keep going.

i’ve done at least 2/3rds of the research for my paper so it’s not a complete freak out of having to start from ground zero with my research. i know i could have been more disciplined in my study and writing but all the initial excitement of being back in school, reading, learning and working through this information has petered out.  the questions i keep asking myself are…

• do i want to be this busy for 3 more years?
• can we really afford this?
• how can i keep learning this great stuff without so much hard work and time commitment?
• am i capable?
• do i want this monkey on my back or would it feel great to not have these deadlines looming over me?
• won’t i miss the great classmates and chap?

so i’m not sure what to do. i’m leaning towards taking a week off from work and cranking out as much of the paper as i can in the week and then devoting a couple hours a day to working on it until it’s done.

dawn and i are going on vacation starting tomorrow and so i think i’ll use the time to pray and consider what is right.  i’m just really disappointed in myself for feeling this way when i was on top of the world when i got accepted last year and excited about going back to school and continuing to dig into my profession.

am i just scared? am i just wondering the professional benefit after i’m done?  it’s not that i ever want to become an academic. i’ve spent some time with them and have do desire to become anyone in an ivory tower that loses touch with what is happening in the real world.

i’m messed up about this.

pax: ty

what a phenomenal week in roseland!  the students did an amazing job, we got to meet and spend time with people more than ever in the neighborhood and we accomplished a great fence building job!

having dawn there has been a blessing these last two years. the fact that i get to share that with her, see her interact with the students and then have the people around the church just shower her with love [and maybe some pity or encouragement for being married to me] has been a highlight.

we think we might go back again at the end of the summer to have a bbq with the church family and drop of a bbq grill for the center.

i love roseland and the 9 years God has allowed me to spend time there. it’s been an honor.

pax: ty

so the work week here at roseland wrapped up yesterday.  what a great week and great group of students and leaders we have!

we were supposed to paint and wallpaper a house with the secondary job being putting up a fence.  it turned out that the painting fell through and we worked all week on putting up the fence.  it was a tough job, but everyone pitched in and did a great job!  it looks great and now the expectant mother moving into the house will have some security and privacy.

the depth of understanding and Christ in these kids has been great to see.  each day a couple of them have led devotions and it’s been so amazing to see what they have come up with and their understanding of scripture and God in our lives.

so today we head out for downtown to enjoy some time together.  i hope there last full day and evening will be a good one for all!

pax: ty

last night we were invited by the munster youth group to a party at a family with a pond.  the pond is complete with a raft, dock and ZIP LINE!

it was sweet.  i wimped out on the zip line, something in my mind said the load capacity might be a little less than the strain my bulk would be putting on it.  but it was great.  we had a good time and the two youth groups seemed to mix some and have a great time.

today we’ll be heading out to work and then getting ready for the kids carnival and community bbq tonight.  always a highlight!

pax: ty

so today was our first work day in roseland and i’m so proud of this team.  they worked hard and really soaked in being the with people in the neighborhood.  it was great to hear them reflect on it after dinner tonight.

these are amazing students!

we had lunch today with the folks in the homeless/drop in shelter and then for dinner we gave everyone $1 and had them get food for dinner at a local mom and pop grocery store in roseland.  the idea was to begin to get a slight understanding of some of the economic factors that go into living in the inner city and on a very tight budget.  having a minimum wage job would limit people to close to a dollar or two for meals and so we wanted to see what that would be like.  buying food in the city also costs more because there are less actual grocery store here and more basic convenience store that cost much more. it was a great experiment and the kids took it well.  now they are out walking around munster with tuba and dawn and i are making them nachos for an evening snack.

it was a very good day!  and it’s dawn and my 2nd anniversary.  it’s so great to be here with her.  i love this woman!

pax: ty

edit • oops, i saved this but didn’t publish it yesterday.

so we’re here starting our roseland week. we arrived in munster about 4:30 michigan time and now dawn and i are starting dinner.

we have 10 kids and 4 adults right now and will have two more adults and another kid coming tuesday.

it’s gonna be a great week!

pax: ty

the weather has made this last week and a half at the beach just rotten. the first days i was really busy with graduation and open houses, then we had our one great turn out for a bbq. over 65 people on a great sunny sunday night. ever since then most days have been cool, rainy or overcast. not much fun when it comes to the beach. it’s also a drag because i’ve been busy at work and so haven’t had time to spend out at the beach as much as i would like.

usually beach week is much better than this. oh well, there’s always next year!

pax: ty

we’re between bouts of rain so the basement is drying out.  i got up at 7:30 this morning and cleaned out our rain gutters.  that was probably about 80% of the cause of our flooding.  the rest is a missing rain gutter, old cracked basement walls and over 6 inches of rain in 5 hours.

so i got a giant floor fan from church and used a shop vac to suck up the water while the fan dries it out along with the dehumidifier.  so it’s getting better but another storm this afternoon added a little seepage back in and there are storms coming in later tonight and maybe again tomorrow.

that’s our life now. it was a good chance however to clean out the rest of the basement and get stuff in storage.  then i cleaned out the garage too, so some good came of it.

we’ll see about getting a new gutter up this week and keep the majority of the water from coming back in.  oh, and we’re not the only ones.  our next door neighbor with the BRAND NEW house [after the fire] had ankle deep water in hers.  and then several friends from church and around town had it worse than us i think too.  having moved most of our basement stuff to storage saved our skin.  thank you God!

pax: ty

even as i type our basement is filling up with water. we’ve had at least 2.4 inches of rain in the last two hours and since our rain gutter in the back came off two years ago and our front gutters or full of all the tree junk from this spring, the water has to go someplace.

of course the basement has not leaked all but a drop or two in the last four years. but now with the house for sale it’s filling up quite nicely.

outstanding. like we have money for this!

pax: ty

why does it seem like every year when i head out to beach week i also get very busy?  i anticipate the end of the year/school stuff, but it seems like meetings, issues and other things jump up at beach week.

i haven’t been here much this year but it did start off with a huge bbq sunday.  over 65 people showed up for chicken, dogs, burgers and brats.  it was a great time!  the coolest thing is that it was families and kids and seniors in high school and senior citizens from church.  a great mix of everyone.

i’m hoping to do it again this sunday just because it was such a great time.  come on out about 5 pm if you are in the area.  lot 199 at holland state park [not the beach sites]

pax: ty